Definition of relationship seems to differ from person to person, all the thoughts and views about it are different with various perspectives. Any good relationship that is meant to work is based on different factors. A true relationship is built on the basis of trust, love, communication, honesty and integrity.
Falling in love is very easy, but realising the worth of a true relationship with a pure intention is very rare to find these days. Some of the couples easily pass all the stages of a relationship overcoming all the obstacles. But some relationships just fall apart due to lack of communication and lack of understanding and lack of effort. So, understanding each and every stage for a successful relationship is very imperative. It can help you to remove any possible threat from the relationship.
Below are some stages mentioned that each and every couple go through or might me going through in order to make the relationship working and successful.
Stage 1: The Euphoric Phase (Early attachment)
The phase when one gets excited. When everything seems to be good as you just started knowing someone. It is the initial stage of a relationship which everyone experiences when they are together. The feeling of intense happiness just because the presence of someone you adore seems to be refreshing and amazing. The love is so passionate that it is hard to stay away from each other. When you are experiencing the first stage of a relationship you often feel that he/she is the one, your soulmate. And feel like you are extremely compatible with each other. Like you are just made for each other. You want to be together all the time, want to talk all the time.
Most of the time it seems like you are addicted to your partner and you ignore all the issues as the feelings overtake the incompatibilities at this stage.
How to handle this stage?
Enjoy the stage, this is the stage that makes you feel special and makes your partner special for you. At this time just be aware that your emotions are heightened and your thinking capability is compromised. You need to be awake and take one step back from making any decision in a hurry. Try to understand each other, ask yourself if the relationship is long lasting or not. Take your time and do not make any decision that will impact you badly. Because all the feelings that you are going through can be temporary and will eventually fade away. So it is better to talk to a good friend and seek some advice.
Stage 2 : The confusing/ Crisis Stage.
The next stage of a relationship when the initial honeymoon phase is over is all about the doubts and differences which can cause a crisis in any relationship. Going through this stage is what makes the bond of a true relation strong and long lasting. In this stage we finally start to notice the differences in personalities and we wake up in a dilemma and the things that used to excite us earlier, start to annoy us. At the second stage the feelings are mixed up, with confusion, doubts and irritation. We start to expect more and sometimes your partner is not aware of what you want. And just because of lack of communication the disappointment starts to increase which always leads to stress. Depending on the situation, we react more than required. And the thought of being made for each other gets replaced with “ maybe we are not meant to be together after all”. The feeling of resentment starts to take place. But this does not mean that the love has faded away. But the feelings are mixed. Without talking to each other a big mistake the couples make is by trying to figure things out on their own which will never sort out the misunderstanding.
How to deal with this stage full of crisis?
To make it through from this stage, one needs to clear the mind and stop overthinking about each and everything. You should know how to deal with every situation and how to react to any problem. No matter how angry or irritated you feel, try to see things from your partner’s perspective as well. Things will not be good all the time, so it is important to understand what is more valuable to you, the misunderstandings or the love and bond you share. No matter how tough the situation is, do not disrespect each other. Every successful relationship you see around you has dealt with the same situation, so it is nothing to worry about. If it is meant to be, it will be. Even if there are differences, try to figure things out by talking about them. Share your feelings and thoughts, do not create a stock of unwanted confusion in your heart just to destroy the relationship. Your patience and love for each other will help you go through this stage and will set a path for you to figure out if the relationship will succeed or fail.
Stage 3 : Disillusionment/Disappointment Stage
The third stage of a relationship is disillusionment, which is most probable the stage where it feels like the relationship is going to end. Slowly and silently the couples drift apart over time. At this point the initial stage seems to fade away and the unwanted silence and miscommunication takes place. Where each minute together can feel like a burden and all the beautiful moments seem to be like a distant memory. A very crucial stage where one starts to feel the disappointment that things are not good as they should be. Hence, we start to create the misconceptions on our own which always can leave a negative impact on our relationship.
How to handle this stage?
Be calm and clear, set your priorities. Stop avoiding the conversations and all the problems. Face them and talk your heart out about everything even if it feels nonsense or meaningless. You must be feeling tired about all the tiring arguments and ignorance, the awkward behaviour. So just keep everything aside, share everything that is going on in your mind. As you have a long way to go together, why let all these unnecessary things take over a good relationship. Think about the good things and positive sides, think and remind yourself why you liked that person, which quality made you fall in love with your partner, why are these differences destroying your relationship. Do you want to part ways or be together forever? If the answer is you want to be together then focus on that, and remember the journey will always be full of ups and downs. Only your efforts and love will make it strong. At this stage, the brain tends to focus on the deficiencies and we try to ignore the good things and just focus on the negativities. Remind yourself about the good things about your partner. All wrong things will try to grab your attention but it is your responsibility to think of the good parts and work on making more good memories. It is just a phase, it will pass by if your relationship has that power.
Stage 4 : Decision Making Stage
Here comes the decision making stage, that finally decides whether to be together or part ways. As the name describes itself it is the stage where everything reaches a breaking point. You may experience heart break and feel low. Start to avoid each other intentionally or move out. At this time you feel like this is it. I give up. As all the situations will push you to think like this. You will know you have reached this place when you start thinking about the scenarios of breaking up. Or looking for a new beginning with someone else. It is nothing new or nothing to be scared of, it happens with most of us. It is human nature. So, this stage makes it crucial to understand the value of each other and decide, either to try and fix the relationship or stay like this and do nothing. Just wait for one person to explode and destroy things.
How to overcome this stage?
Basically, even if the couples want to part their ways it can be done with effective communication and understanding. Not always by fighting and not respecting each other. At this stage it is important to realise that you have surpassed almost everything together. If you really love each other try to understand why you are at this point if your bond is strong. Give yourself a chance to discuss and describe your feelings to make the decision. If you want to stay together or not. If despite all the differences in all the stages you decide to be together it means your relationship is the strongest and the bond you share is irreplaceable. At this stage you can figure out if you are soulmates and made for each other. Give it some time and think about each and everything. If positive things are more than there is no need to suffer. Be each other’s strength.
Be mature enough to realise everything, so even if you don’t want to be together do it respectfully and honestly. And if you want to be together then nothing can break you apart, each and every stage with time will make your bond stronger.
Stage 5: Wholehearted Love
The fifth stage and the healthiest stage of a relationship is wholehearted love. When you both know about the differences and weaknesses of each other. But still try to balance it with balancing your qualities, which makes your bond the best bond ever. At this stage you feel blessed to overcome all the problems and finally love and enjoy being together. A stage when you know no one can replace this person or no one can make you this comfortable and secure. There is nothing such as “perfect couple”, perfection comes with time and patience. With the understanding to be each other’s back. At this point you realise why you chose this person and how blessed you are to fall in love with the same person again.
Hardships are still there in each stage, you just need the right person to stand and fight against them with you.
So don’t be scared to love if you have the one who can be with you and survive with you in all situations.
How to deal with this stage?
Be happy, appreciate each other’s effort. This stage only comes when you have these qualities: Love, Trust, Care, Humour, respect. If you have these qualities in common for each other you know you can deal with any situation. Couples who stay together forever continuously seek something good about their partners and appreciate them. Which helps them grow emotionally, mentally and financially as well.
Always know that challenges will be waiting somewhere in the future but you need to be well equipped to face them. Just trust in yourself and your partner. As there is a reason you guys are together. Enjoy the journey as not everyone is lucky enough to live with someone they love.
When things are going good, anyone can be with you. But the one who is with you after the hardships and low moments is the one who deserves you at your best.
So know your worth and if you’ve got the one who knows your worth, fight for it. Never let them go.